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Ninja Gaiden II (Xbox 360)

First and foremost I’d like to say, THIS GAME IS FUCKING AWESOME! Secondly, I'll take this opportunity to thank Ninja F for giving me the most stress/anger I have ever taken away from a video game. This game is literally fucking ridiculous. To date I have yet to beat this game, mainly due to the big-ass fucking "archfiend" you meet at the end of the story.

For those of you who are not aware, beating this game is pretty much like a big fucking deal. This game is difficult 15 seconds in, then not only doesn’t let off, but gets increasingly difficult the closer you get to the end.

I’d also like to take this chance to thank Team Ninja (Publishers of Ninja Gaiden series) for introducing Ryu Hayabusa, by far the most raw bad-assed mother fucker to ever be unleashed in the gaming world. I mean seriously guys, this is without a doubt the best character to ever play. He has everything main character should have. Sweet weapons, projectiles, unbelievable agility, spandex and a huge cock-shaped bulge. Marry that with intense gore, violence and bouncy tits...I'd say this game is a good competitor for game of the year. I mean, for whatever year it was produced.

So I'm giving this game the TRIPLE THICK HARD SALAMARONI. I recommend you go buy this game now. However, I must warn you this game is ridiculously hard and only 1 out of 10 people beat it..3 of the 10 die trying to mimic Ryu in real life and the remainder find themselves in the fetal position.

Anyway it turns out you’ll be alright! Best of Luck!

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Gears of War 2 (Xbox 360)

Dear god… where do I start?

We had hoped the Lightmass bombing at Timgad would
decimate the Locust Horde, but they survived, and
returned stronger than ever. They’ve brought with
them a force that can sink entire cities.

Even Jacinto, our last beacon of hope through all
these dark days, is now at risk. Soon we’ll have
nothing left to defend and that means we have only
one option: attack.

Gears, what I ask of you is not an easy thing,
but it is necessary. If we are to survive, if we are
to live long enough to see the seasons pass, our
children grow, and experience a time of peace that
we have never known, we must now take the fight to
the Locust.

We will go to where they live and where they breed
And we will destroy them.

This is the day we take the battle to the heart of
the enemy. This is the day we correct the course of
human history. This is the day we ensure our survival
as a species!

Soldiers of the COG, my fellow Gears, go forth and
Bring back the hope of humanity!

-Chairman Prescott
(Written By Epic Games)

This game is FUCKING awesome! I for one rarely get goose bumps from video games however what Gears 2 has done is almost unheard of. I played that game and felt that I was almost under the same circumstances as those of the soldiers of the COG. In this second Installment to the Gears of Wars series no expense was wasted creating the greatest game that I have ever played.

To spoil all the features of this game would be wrong. It is something that a person needs to discover on their own. I can tell you that your arsenal has increased dramatically, and that the online component has made it one of the biggest hits to ever meet XBL.

Gears 2 requires no knowledge of the previous installment, although you should know Gears 1 WAS FUCKING AWESOME! The simple fact that it bears the name Gears of War and is made by Epic Games should be enough for you to dish out the cash and help save humanity from the Locust Horde.